


I Look At You, But I Think Of You Even More...

by AlexiaTheRook



Series: Do You Ever Lie Awake At Night? [2]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Idols, Fluff, Gay Panic, Inspired by Jeonghan's Side of the Story in Is It Hard For You To Sleep Because Of Me Too?, Jeonghan is Bad at Feelings, Late Nights, M/M, Mentions of SVT Memes & Fandom, Oneshot, jeonghan centric, oh my era
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-03-15
Packaged: 2019-11-18 07:30:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18116150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexiaTheRook/pseuds/AlexiaTheRook
Summary: Yoon Jeonghan has had way too many restless nights thinking about one person in particular.Choi Seungcheol.Only problem is that he'd rather not face his feelings and possibly lose the closest friend Jeonghan has.So if that means enduring more lonely nights staring at the ceiling in his dorm room, he'll gladly do so.The reverse side of "Is It Hard For You To Sleep Because Of Me Too?" as told by Jeonghan's POV. It can be read as a standalone or as part of a series.





	I Look At You, But I Think Of You Even More...

**Author's Note:**

> I was thinking a bit about doing a reverse side of my other fic Is It Hard For You To Sleep Because Of Me Too? where it's Jeonghan's POV instead but I wasn't totally sure if people wanted to read it.
> 
> My friend Olivia was actually the one who said I should go for it, so thank you to Olivia for motivating me to write more. :3  
> Let me know what you think either on here, or Twitter & Instagram!  
> @AlexiaTheRook is what I go by on all my socials so come say hi & fangirl about KPop with me if you'd like! I'll probably be doing a giveaway on my Twitter soon at 800 followers!

**1,069 days.**

 

That's how long it's been since Yoon Jeonghan realized he loved Choi Seungcheol.

 

 

1,069 sleepless nights of thinking about how beautiful of a human being Seungcheol is. 25,656 hours of thinking about Seungcheol's smile, or how kind and helpful he was to the other members. 1,539,360 minutes of wondering if Seungcheol felt the same way as he did.

 

And honest to any deity that would listen, Jeonghan was getting sick of that last one.

 

 

1:43 AM was far too late to be staying up wondering about feelings, especially with the schedule Jeonghan had the next morning, yet here he was  .  Wondering if the remark Seungcheol said about him having a cute smile was him  just  being nice, or if he actually thought that way  . Letting out a grunt of frustration, Jeonghan rolled onto his side and stared at the wall opposite of him.  He glared at the wall as he considered any possible flirtatiousness behind Seungcheol's remark earlier that day  .  Maybe  he's imagining things again? That's what Jeonghan wanted to believe.

 

After giving the wall the stink eye for about five minutes, Jeonghan gave up on trying to figure it out. _"If I'm not going to sleep,_ _ I might  _ _as well hydrate myself."_ Jeonghan thought to himself as he got up from his bed.

 

 

One bottle of water & a few laps around the dorms later, Jeonghan was back in his bed staring at the ceiling.  He thought he heard movement from Wonwoo and Seungcheol's room when he walked by, but a quick glance in the room revealed that wasn't the case .

 

Jeonghan  was tempted  to pop in for a second to look at Seungcheol's sleeping form, but decided against it in case he woke up  .  So Jeonghan was here, watching silly edits on Twitter for his bandmates and attempting to keep his giggles silent  . Looking at memes of Hansol's face seemed much more appealing than staring at the ceiling. Most likely contemplating  whether or not  his bandmate had the same feelings he had.

 

The Jeonghan of tomorrow was going to regret staying up this late, but the Jeonghan of today was content. That's all that mattered.

 

 

_~~(He fell asleep about 20 minutes later to a compilation of SEVENTEEN singing acapella)~~ _

 

* * *

 

Two cups of coffee the next morning and the sunrise put Jeonghan in a much more chipper mood than he was in last night.  Just  him, the warm cup of coffee in his hands, the sunrise, and complete silence.

 

 

Well, that and Joshua sitting right across from him at the table with an almost identical mug of coffee.  Joining him was a notebook and a Bible, the pages of both the Bible and the notebook  being covered  in various notes and highlights  . What it  was supposed  to mean or relate to Jeonghan didn't know anything about, nor did he care enough to ask. He did know to not disrupt Joshua from whatever it is he was doing. It was the reason he was up first out of everyone in SEVENTEEN no matter how early his schedule started that day.

 

Jeonghan started playing some sort of time killer he had on his phone and finishing up his cup of coffee While Joshua finished whatever he was writing . Joshua closed his notebook and Bible and put them into a stack next to him. He grabbed his coffee from out in front of him and took a sip as he glanced in Jeonghan's direction.

 

"You seem to have something on your mind Jeonghan, something up?"

 

Jeonghan  just  shrugged his shoulders and continued messing around on his phone. Joshua gave him a skeptical look.

 

"You sure Hannie?" Joshua inquired, "You usually have SOMETHING to show me on Twitter after I finish my devotions. Are you sure you're okay?"

 

Jeonghan shut off his phone and looked Joshua in the eyes. "Really  Joshua. I'm fine. I  just  have a lot on mind is all."

 

Joshua nodded his head in understanding before responding, "Do you wanna talk about it?"

 

"No." Jeonghan responded  curtly  . "I'm  just  thinking about someone is all."

 

Joshua nodded his head in understanding, "Ah. Did someone do something that hurt you?"

 

"Something like that." Jeonghan responded as he took another sip of coffee. Joshua let out a quiet hmm noise as he sat in thought for a minute.

 

"Have you tried talking to them?  Maybe  seeing if you could work out the problem?" Joshua finally recommended after his long moment of thought.

 

"Uhhhmmm..."  Jeonghan let out as he thought back about whether he had actually TALKED to Seungcheol about his feelings. His mind drew a blank.

 

Joshua leaned back in his seat as he swept his chocolate brown bangs from his eyes. "I thought so. You should talk to whoever it is, it'll help you quite a bit you know."

 

Jeonghan slumped in his chair and pouted a bit.  He knew that he had to  eventually  talk to Seungcheol about this, but he also didn't want to risk making Seungcheol feel uncomfortable to be near him.  Thinking about that made Jeonghan feel almost sick, he hated the thought of losing his best friend and crush.

 

Joshua dropped the subject and reached for his mug of coffee on the table as one of the managers walked in with bags of fast food in his arms.

 

"Is that for us?" Joshua asked. The manager nodded his head with a smile on his face.

 

"This is our apology for making you all get up so early to get to this MV shoot over the past couple of weeks. We got something for everyone." The manager set the paper bags on the table with a large smile on his face.

"Wait. Are you the only two awake? We have to be out of here in an hour tops or we're gonna be late!" He exclaimed.

 

Jeonghan and Joshua looked at each other and jumped out of their chairs. Coffee and discussion were long forgotten as they went to wake the other members for their day.

* * *

Jeonghan and Joshua had woken up the rest of the members, who  were seated  around the table already eating their breakfast as Jeonghan walked down the hall towards the last room . Seungcheol and Wonwoo's room to be exact.

 

The thought of a sleeping Seungcheol made Jeonghan a little nervous, but he took a deep breath and steeled his nerves .

 

He swung the door open to see Wonwoo retreating into a large cocoon of blankets from the sunlight coming into the room  .  Seungcheol was attempting to detangle himself from his bedsheets, and Jeonghan willed himself to not blush at the sight of his bare chest.

 

 

"Guys c'mon, the managers brought breakfast! We leave to shoot the last bit of footage for our new MV in an hour so get up."  Jeonghan stated  cheerfully  as he walked over to Wonwoo's blanket nest and began shaking the rapper awake.

 

Wonwoo let out a grumble of complaint before yanking the blanket over his head, trying to get a few more precious minutes of sleep.

 

Jeonghan could hear a chuckle from Seungcheol standing off to the side, presumably slipping on some clothes.

 

Wonwoo refused to budge, no matter what Jeonghan tried.

 

 

"C'mon Wonwoo. Last thing you want is for Jeonghan to drag you out of that bed." Seungcheol warned  lightheartedly  as he was leaving the room, smiling at the two of them.

Jeonghan smiled back as Wonwoo rubbed the sleep from his eyes, then walked over to the doorway where Seungcheol was waiting .

 

In an act of boldness, Jeonghan patted Seungcheol on the arm and smiled at him as he walked towards the commotion that was the main room . A light blush spread across his face as he walked away.

 

 

_"What the heck did I do that for?!"_  Jeonghan thought to himself as he rounded the corner, panicking the entire time.

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize if there are any errors. I wanted this to get out ASAP so I din't proofread as well as I should have...  
> I'll fix any errors I find later, in the meantime let me know if you liked it & what you want to see more of!


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